“What do you want to do after you graduate?” This is a question people love to ask college students. When I try to answer, I start stuttering. Even though I’ve declared a major doesn’t mean I know what I want to do with my life after I graduate. I’ve come to find that college majors rarely apply to first post-grad jobs.
Just because I don’t know what I want to do doesn’t mean I’m a slacker (I’m one of the sharpest knives in school because of my work ethic). It worries me that I don’t know what direction my life is going after graduation. I’ve always been a planner. I’m the dork who creates to-do lists to stay on task every day. If I don’t have a plan, I get nervous. So, of course, I want to have a plan after college.
But it’s impossible to develop a plan when I don’t know what I want to do. I feel like I’m walking at night with a flashlight that only shows two feet in front of me. I can’t believe in less than ten months I’ll be walking across the stage to accept my diploma. Then that’ll be it, I’ll be released into the world and free of the comfort Washburn provided for two years.
My post-grad world will be filled with pressures, expectations, challenge, and responsibilities. I really don’t want to fail because of the people who’ve told me I’ll do great things. I want to be confident about the future, but I’m terrified. I’m scared of failing, scared of missing out, and scared of not succeeding. I want everything to work out for the best. Unfortunately, I have no way of knowing if it will and that kills me.