The hashtag #TransformationTuesday is a common social media tag. I like examining the differences between the adjacent photos. I wonder, “What were they like when the first photo was taken? Who were they? Have they really changed?” I think about who I am now compared to who I was in my last relationship. If I created a #TransformationTuesday post it’d consist of a 16-year-old girl and a 22-year-old woman. The photos would display the same person at two different stages in life.


I remember a bubbly, innocent girl who was enjoying her time in high school. She had great friends, a love of theatre and a crush on a boy in her church choir. Her outgoing personality allowed her to make new friends instantly. He wasn’t like her. He was a shy musician who isolated himself from others. This is why they were drawn to each other. She saw something no one else did, and in time she helped him recognize his potential. He grew because of her influence.

She should have seen the warning signs, but being in love for the first time creates a blind spot. He craved all her love and attention, which left none for the remainder of the people in her life. After a while, she transformed from an open girl to a manipulated robot. He made her the center of his universe and expected the same in return. After she broke up with him, she didn’t know how to revert back to who she was before.

The photo on the left wouldn’t say any of that. All people would see is a smiling girl. Reverting back to who I was before the relationship took some time. But when I look at where I am now, what I’m doing and my relationships, I see her – the girl I was before. I’m back to connecting with others and sharing all my love and attention with everyone. No longer the girl who was restricted from living her life. I hope when people look at the photo on the right they see a confident, capable young woman who is in a new loving relationship.


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