Introducing your significant other to your family is daunting, but so is introducing him to your friends. It’s important that he gets along well with the most important people in your life. If he doesn’t, it can present huge obstacles later on. My boyfriend passed the family test less than six months into our relationship, and he’s spent multiple occasions with them since. However, it wasn’t until a couple days ago that he met one of my best friends. I can’t believe it took almost a year and a half to coordinate this meeting, but we can finally cross it off.
For a little backstory, there was a reason I was nervous for this meeting. We all know guy/girl friendships can be complicated, especially when one or both parties are in relationships. Earlier on, my boyfriend and I got into a very heated argument about this friendship. When we resolved it, we concluded that neither of us handled it in the best way. I should’ve worked harder to set up a chance for them to meet because without it my boyfriend was left feeling uncomfortable, which hadn’t even crossed my naïve mind.
My friend lives in St. Louis and sporadically comes back to visit and my boyfriend lives an hour away; so coordinating a meeting time wasn’t easy. Finally the timing matched up. Saturday July 8, my friend came to town for the weekend and my boyfriend visited me for the day. Choosing what to do was difficult. I didn’t want my single friend to feel like a third wheel, so I involved my family in the plan: pizza and an at-home game night. When my friend showed up at the house, I anxiously introduced him to my boyfriend. Like men do, they shook hands in a friendly manner.
After a delicious dinner, the three of us plus my siblings gathered in the basement and dug into a pile of games. We started with Phase 10, a complex card game. Next we switched to Bananagrams, a freestyle version of Scrabble. The fun part of this vocabulary-based game was the fierce competition between my friend and my brother. They were both quick thinkers, so the game moved as fast as their minds. Despite my extroverted friend being more subdued than usual, plenty of laughing and shouting took place during both games.
After several rounds of Bananagrams, we took an ice-cream break, and then engaged in a board game called Loaded Questions. This was the perfect game to play because the purpose was to test your knowledge of other players and learn more about them at the same time. Surprisingly, my brother ended up winning even though I was the furthest ahead for the majority of the game. Our final game was Apples to Apples: the adult version. The main differences between the versions were more contemporary nouns on the red cards and two adjectives to choose from on each green card. We played to five green cards, and my boyfriend ended up dominating us all.
After four games we were all pretty exhausted. After we finished Apples to Apples it was after 11 p.m. The five of us ended up talking and sharing stories until close to 1 a.m. I was shocked my siblings stayed up so late. I guess when you’re all exchanging fart stories; it’s difficult not to be entertained. (Cue eye roll) At 1 a.m. my boyfriend and I drove my friend back to his Dad’s place. We mutually agreed on how fun the night had been and said our goodbyes.
As fulfilling as the night had been, I was sad it was so late. My boyfriend headed home at 1:30 a.m., and I was left wishing we could’ve had more alone time together. However, I knew it was worth it for the two of them to finally meet and for my siblings to spend more time with my boyfriend. It was even worth waking up with a horrendous migraine the following morning after not going to bed until 4 a.m. for some unknown reason.
I spent the next day recovering from a persistent headache with movies, R&R and caffeine. During the day I kept having a recurring thought from the night before. During the argument my boyfriend and I had about my best friend back in January, I was fighting to keep the friendship the same. But after Saturday night, I realized the likelihood of the friendship lasting is next to nothing. In that moment, I suddenly realized I’d be fine if it ended. He and I have been best friends for over 10 years, but I think the reason I’d be okay if the friendship didn’t last is because I have a new best friend now… and it’s the man I’m dating.
“There’s a reason BF stands for boyfriend and best friend. They should be one in the same.”